I had intended to return to my blog a week after my trip and write about my experiences in Canada. I planned to go into detail about the scenery and all the outdoor beauty. Instead, I found myself pondering life on a new level early this morning. Something in my world has shifted and I’ve been experiencing an inner resistance because of it. Canada is in fact very beautiful and I had felt drawn to it for the last year or so. Turns out I am walking across a puzzle bridge and Canada was one piece missing somewhere in the middle. I made it to the cliff’s edge and gazed over it before crossing. I even made it past the first few steps where more of the canyon was revealed below. I have seen the raging waters and witnessed the danger. Rocks fall silently on either side of the canyon, and no one reaches out to catch them. The bridge is my safety net built by The One who created all things. He says “Trust me, be still, and know that I am God.”
Well… I did that whole trusting thing and then I came to a dead stop. Where do I go from here? I can turn around and go back, I can try and jump to the other side, or I can sit and wait… but wait for what?
I sat and waited. Guess what happened? God said “go to Canada.”
BUT GOD THERE IS A GAPING WHOLE!!!
You want me to jump?!
He said in fewer or more words, Canada is the missing piece.
WELL THANKS FOR TELLING ME THAT A YEAR LATER.
I finally made it, and at the end of it, I was scratching my head asking God why on earth He wanted me to go there. It wasn’t for the scenery or the the exhilarating hikes, it was to teach me how to appreciate home. I’ve been longing to leave the country for a long time and Canada was a huge pat on my back and a stern demand: GET UP and walk.
Thanks be to God who stretched out his hand and placed that missing puzzle piece right where it belonged. Early this morning I took one step forward by giving my life over to God (again for the billionth time). I don’t know where God is calling anymore, though I used to think I had it all figured out. I pictured myself climbing through the mountains in Nepal teaching children and mothers about the love of Christ. I saw myself in Africa surrounded by children, and in a Pakistan Orphanage. I don’t know if I’ll do any of those things, but I know one thing for sure in this exact moment: God is calling me to teach, to sing, to speak and write. He is calling me to redefine my understanding of home.
I bet you are expecting to read what my definition of home has become. I am pleased to inform you that I am still working on it. I’ll also be working on an illustration of a puzzle bridge. It would sound a lot cooler if you could see inside my brain! 😉